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August 15, 2010 / rinta chos

How far I’ve been?

I’ve been far enough. I’ve settled down in Yogyakarta, gonna spend a lot of time here for the next 4 years.

Right now I’m typing this entry in my brand new room, I like it (a lot), it’s basically a room-came-true.. I’ve always wanted a big cupboard with a mirror on it and an United States flag bedcover and sheet and no bed, just a simple futon. (But damn, the futon’s hard, it feels like sleeping in a brick).

PS : I’m not a fan of Real Madrid, my mom choose the carpet for me.And no, I dont have any idea why it has to be Real Madrid.. -,-

July 24, 2010 / rinta chos

Series of impulsive actions

Hey there, whoever reading this, I’m currently sitting around in Dunkin Donuts, Tawang Train Station, Semarang. I’m waiting for the train that’ll take me home to Jakarta..

How I ended up here? Well.. As the title of the post says : series of impulsive actions.
When the time is getting closer to my 18th birthday, I have this huge urgency to run away from everything.. I need to be alone but to not feel lonely, I need to be in a moment called : perfect solitude. Because only in that moment, I’ll be able to refresh my mind, like if I’m a PC, my owner push a restart button, instead of pushing F5 button continously.

I’ve a lot of things going through my mind and this ‘things’ is unexplainable, I don’t have any exact words to describe my condition.. Let’s just call it temporary insanity before you turn 18. I know one thing for sure though, the only way to cure my temporary insanity is having a reunion with nature. Nature is simple but gives an unbearable amount of joyness and happiness to me. The human spirit needs places where nature has not been rearranged by the hand of man.

So here’s the story. On July 23rd, 2 days before my birthday, I got a broadcast message from my elementary school friend. It says : who wants to go to Karimun Jawa? Only 700rb IDR, we’re going tonight at 7 PM, meet us at Rawamangun Bus Station. And I was like bam! This is it, I bet it’s God’s sign for me,He’s calling me to see another perfect creation of Him.I enthusiastically called my mother and she said it’s okay, up to me, as long as I use my own money, and thank God I currently had enough money in my bank account.

Actually there’s one thing that keep me from going to Karimun Jawa.. There’s a Car Free Day event on July 25th, I want to go there with my friends.. But my heart told me to go to Karimun Jawa, and I can’t stop now.. My mind is clouded with poisonus smokes and as I mentioned it before, I can’t talk about words could describe it.And eventhough I’ll be around them, my mind and soul will wander somewhere,my mind and soul will keep bugging me until I can find a cure for that poisonus smokes. I’ll be like a zombie who lacks in enthusiasm.

Well, in shorts, I was in a bus, on my way to Jepara with Inu (my elementary school friend who broacasted the message) and her 3 friends: Meimei, Ana, and Neni..but the bus broke down in Tegal around 1 o’clock, and there’s no way we could catch another bus to Jepara, we decided to take another bus that will take us to Semarang, from Semarang, we’ll go to Jepara and then catch the ship to Karimun Jawa. However, we’re extremely late (stupid bus and bus driver and I think I’m in a total bad luck that day), we should be on board at 9 AM, but we barely reach Semarang at 11 AM.. My 4 friends decided to go to Jogja first and then catch the next ship on July 26th.But that’ll take too long, I should be in Jkt at the 27th. At this moment, my heart tells me to part away from them and take a train back to Jakarta. (SERIES OF IMPULSIVE ACTIONS). So while they go to Jogja, I decided to go back to Jakarta.And here I am, Dunkin Donuts, Tawang Train Station, Semarang.. Alone but weird enough, not feeling lonely. I feel fulfilled instead, my soul isn’t broken anymore and I’m finally happy (like real happy).

I saw beautiful night sky with stars, rice fields, mountains, cirrus clouds (my favorite), blue sky, and simple uncomplicated people, along my journey.. That fills me up. It feels like God is finally around me again.. And I’m not so alone.. (I’m sure He always around me, but with Jakarta’s filthy atmosphere.. I can’t feel a thing).

Maybe I still can’t explain it bluntly, so I’ll let the quotes told you how I exactly feel.

Look at the trees, look at the birds, look at the clouds, look at the stars… and if you have eyes you will be able to see that the whole existence is joyful.  Everything is simply happy.  Trees are happy for no reason; they are not going to become prime ministers or presidents and they are not going to become rich and they will never have any bank balance.  Look at the flowers – for no reason.  It is simply unbelievable how happy flowers are.  ~Osho

I love to think of nature as an unlimited broadcasting station, through which God speaks to us every hour, if we will only tune in.  ~George Washington Carver

Nature is my medicine.  ~Sara Moss-Wolfe

Those who dwell among the beauties and mysteries of the earth are never alone or weary of life.  ~Rachel Carson

And the best quote ever! :
There is a pleasure in the pathless woods,
There is a rapture on the lonely shore,
There is society, where none intrudes,
By the deep sea, and music in its roar:
I love not man the less, but Nature more.
~George Gordon, Lord Byron, Childe Harold’s Pilgrimage

A day away from being legal, Rintachos.

PS : I love to sit alone in a comfy place, doing nothing but reading a book and I definitely enjoy walking around alone, with nothing but my iPod, I love to take pictures of an endless beautiful scenery that I won’t ever find in Jakarta.

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry.

April 25, 2010 / rinta chos

Kafein, buku, dan analogi yang ga nyambung.

Kafein, ialah senyawa alkaloid xantina berbentuk kristal dan berasa pahit yang bekerja sebagai obat perangsang psikoaktif dan diuretik ringan.Salah satu dampak dari kafein adalah meningkatnya aktivitas otak dan mengakibatkan hormon epinefrin terlepas. Hormon tersebut akan menaikkan detak jantung.

Gue adalah seorang pecandu kafein.Gue mengkonsumsi kopi dengan jumlah banyak, bisa lebih dari 3 bungkus sehari, selain itu, dulu gue juga pecandu soft drinks yang notabene nya mengandung paling ngga 25 mg kafein.Efek kafein buat gue itu bukan cuma penahan kantuk, tapi juga tambahan energi, kalo lagi suntuk, gue minum kopi, langsung deh seger dan ga suntuk lagi. Tapi, akibatnya adalah tubuh gue jadi kebal sama kafein jadi kalo gue ga mengkonsumsi kafein dalam jumlah yang biasa gue konsumsi, gue langsung pusing, terus ya ujung ujungnya insomnia.

Selain pecandu kafein, gue juga pecandu buku bagus.

Buku bagus dan kafein berpengaruh sejajar sama gue. Buku bagus merangsang entah hormon apa yang mengakibatkan detak jantung gue berdebar lebih kencang dan efek lebih lanjutnya pun sama, gue insomnia karena gue kepikiran betapa bagusnya buku tersebut. Bedanya kafein dengan buku adalah di after taste dan aspek psikologi setelahnya, after taste kafein ya, ya gak ada, udah gitu aja, tapi kalo buku bagus, itu ngebekas, tertanam di fikiran, quotes quotesnya, pelajaran pelajaran yang diambil dari buku tersebut. Buku bagus banyak tapi buku bagus yang menghanyutkan itu sedikit, cuma ada segelintir buku yang bisa mengubah mind set gue, dari sekian banyak buku yg sudah gue baca.

Gue baca buku, mulai dari Hamlet dan Julius Caesar nya Hamlet sampe Harry Potter nya J.K. Rowling. Harry Potter itu buku bagus, tapi tidak mengubah mind set gue, setelah gue baca Harry Potter ya gue terhibur cuma gue ga langsung “mikir” apa ya pesan dibalik buku ini? Kenapa begitu? Karena Harry Potter itu kisah fiksi, gamungkin juga tiba tiba gue dapet surat di kotak pos rumah gue kan. 1984 dan Animal Farm nya George Orwell itu juga buku bagus, setengah fakta, karena memang ada Negara totalitarian seperti yg diceritakan Orwell, tapi buku itu ga membuat gue berfikir lebih lanjut, karena apa? Gue ga bisa relate to the story. Gue cm bisa terhanyut dengan horror yg dibawa Orwell. Lalu ada buku bagus macam Catcher in the Rye, ditulis oleh Almarhum J.D. Salinger, buku ini salah satu buku yg dianjurkan dibaca oleh murid2 SMA di Amerika.Pas lo baca, lo bakal mikir “what the hell dude, it’s just a story about a labile kid wandering around NYC and commenting on every single thing he sees” , tapi buku ini filosofi nya sangat mendalam..inilah buku yang gue maksud bikin lo mikir, bikin lo pengen nge Google dan pengen tau apa anggepan orang orang tentang ni buku, buku ini controversial karena pembunuhnya Sir Lennon memutuskan untuk membunuh Sir Lennon setelah baca buku ini. After taste Catcher in the Rye buat gue? Hahah. Gue jadi berusaha untuk gak munafik, gue pengen ketika gue step into kedewasaan, gue tetap sama innocent dan tidak fake nya seperti ketika gue masih anak anak polos. Terus ada deretan buku dari Mitch Albom, asu, gue nangis molo kalo baca bukunya dia, bukunya Albom tuh bukan fun-type reading tp anjirr ngena lah pokoknya. Recommended sekali loh For One More Day, gue nangis tersedu sedu baca itu (karena waktu itu lg jauh sih sm Hexe a.k.a. my mom).

Pusing ya baca tulisan panjang gue? Haha. Sori. Inti dari semua ngemeng2 gue ini adalah : Gue baru saja membaca buku luar biasa karangan penulis Indonesia, Donny Dhirgantoro, berjudul 5 cm. Selama ini kan gue menutup diri dari buku karangan penulis Indonesia (kecuali sastra lamanya). Tapi kan gue mau jadi penulis Indonesia yg bs menghasilkan karya bagus yang bikin orang mikir.Masa gue menutup diri dari buku2 Indonesia? Jadi di sore yg random, sama random nya kayak pas gue beli buku nya Cassandra Niki, gue pergi ke Gramedia, gue liat liat buku Indonesia, terus gue ya pengen aja ngambil 5 cm ini..terus gue pegang molo, tp belom niat beli krn gue lg pengen beli buku traveling..trs gue dpt bbm dari Dei dia blg iya baca 5 cm, novel Indonesia terbagus yg dia pernah baca.

Jadilah ini gue yang menghabiskan 3 jam membaca 5 cm. , terus gue doh sori bgt neh bahasanya norak, tp gue terhanyut, terharu. Seneng bgt bisa baca buku bagus setelah sekian lama. Well done Mas Donny Dhirgantoro.

My next post akan ngomongin 5 cm. detil nya dan kenapa gue jatuh cinta sama bukunya. (Y)

April 24, 2010 / rinta chos

Single fighter. Once again.

I’m used to being a “single fighter”. Single means “one person or thing;single one;sole;alone” and fighter means “a person with the will, courage, determination, ability, or disposition to fight, struggle, resist, etc.”. So in conclusion, I’m that one particular person who fight, struggle, and resist all alone. Why do I refer myself as a “single fighter” ? Because, well, it started when I was in 3rd grade of elementary school. I moved out from Balikpapan to Jakarta, all alone, I struggled and I cried like a baby almost everyday because I think it’s very hard for an 8 years old kid to be all alone in a new school with no one to befriend with. And then in 10th grade, wow, high school year, big deal, I was alone..again..there were 4 other kids from my junior high school but I knew exactly nothing about them.. so I felt like a loner, and I had to fight and struggle again, with all the courage and determination I tried to look for a friend (Lucky me, I didn’t just find an ordinary friends, I found an extraordinary bestfriends and also a family :<)).

Later on, 12th grade, I was an exchange student, and yep, I was destined to be a “single fighter” again. I got placed in Utah, and none of my fellow Nacel-ers got placed in the same state.

I’ve been fighting for my life, I’ve been fighting to adapt well in the whole new environment. Fighter fight in a battle, in a battle you can’t directly win and conquer the glory. You have to fight first, you have to get your body parts swollen, you have to burst out some tears, you have to be down for a moment, but the end, you have to rise up and conquer your glory.

Adaptation is something that’s not new in my dictionary, I’ve been doing it for almost 17 years of life. However even though I’m used to that ‘adaptation’ thingies, it does sucks for the first phase, that whole “Mad World” things you have to go through, it sucks to leave your comfort zone and build another one in other place.

I cant help but feel scared. I’m scared of not having a friend who will share same thoughts or even same taste of music, I’m scared of the new foods and culture, I’m scared I’m not welcomed in the new area, I’m scared I’ve take the wrong direction and my life could’ve been happier if I don’t take this direction.

I’m scared of being faraway from my friends, I’m scared they wont miss me, because they’re all in the same place, and I’m the single fighter, I’m alone. I’m scared when they’re already happy with their new phase, I’m still miserable.

Being a single fighter is a goddamn nightmare.But, in the other hand, I’m proud of myself. I’m proud because I always chosen the road less traveled by people. And I know, I know it’ll make a differences, and differences is like the cure of everyday’s boredom, differences is fascinating, and I love to be fascinated. I’m proud because I’m brave enough to be a single fighter.


PS : Road less traveled or Road not taken is a poem by my favorite poet, Robert Frost. I’m hooked to it ever since I read it in 2006. It’s the most inspirational poem I’ve ever read and it’ll always be like that.

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry I could not travel both

April 24, 2010 / rinta chos

Half review; Half curhatan. Letters, Stories, & Dreams by Cassandra Niki

I recently just bought and read Cassandra Niki’s book: Letters, Stories & Dreams.Even though I absolutely love to read, I barely read any Indonesian novel (I think I mentioned it before). I don’t mean to be cocky or anything, it’s just everytime I read Indonesian novel, I cant help but feel envious (I mentioned this before too).Why? well because I freakin love to write and I want to publish my own novel too, but I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to publish my own novel.

Btw. Jadi Cassandra Niki or well known as Casseybunn ini adalah seorang inspirational writer, photographer, dan plus dia adalah mahasiswi UGM.(In conclusion, she’s everything I want to be). Gue mulai tau dia sebenernya baru tahun lalu, dari temen gue Erika a.k.a Ujang. Sejak pertama kali liat hasil fotografinya, I’m instantly amazed and fell in love. Later on, Ujang kasitau kalo dia blogger juga. Well honestly, I never read her blog before because as I mentioned before, I get jealous by successful blogger and writer such as Raditya Dika or her.

Tahun 2010 I heard that Casseybunn merilis novelnya. I’m dead curious. Tapi mau dikata apa? I was dead busy from January to April. I spent that 4 months for studying, praying, dreaming, and worrying (just like most 12th grader did).Well God is full of mercy and He surely is the most merciful of all. I’m officialy free, starting April 17th. Lalu gue yang pengangguran ini bingung harus apa, well gue memutuskan untuk menjadi good reader once again, because good reader makes a good writer(dan gue tidak akan berhenti berusaha menjadi good writer). Dan sore hari yg random, I abruptly decided to bought Cassey’s book. (meskipun tau setelahnya gue akan meletup2 kesenangan dan iri, both at the same time)

I’m totally right. Gue beli itu buku sore ini. Menghabiskan 3 jam membacanya dan the after taste : meletup2 kesenangan plus iri. I CAN RELATE SO MUCH TO HER BOOK. Masa-masa SMA nya(stress ujian, bingung pilih jurusan), her way in writing letter ( I write, well not letter, tp gue nulis ketika gue gatau mau kata apa lagi), her dreams (we have different dreams, dia mau jd filmmaker, I simply want to be a rich-traveler, I know it’s not a profession tp itulah mimpi gue, intinya sih we both are dreamer and we wont stop dreamin, keep dreamin while it’s free, rite?), gue bahkan bisa relate ke fakta bahwa she’s an orphan (GOOD MAN, DIE YOUNG :,,) ), just like me. WHAT’S SO GOOD ABOUT THIS BOOK IS : IT’S LIKE #damnright, so ordinary but enthralling. Kayak sebenernya ini cerita biasa tp jadi luar biasa karena inilah kehidupan nyata yang dialami orang orang kebanyakan. ( That’s my favorite kind of book, thats why I’m not into Sci-Fi)

Well, I’m one step closer to reach my dream to publish a book like her, sekarang kan gue mahasiswi UGM juga haha (kalo Cass ga suka Jogja, gue kebalikan, I’m more like Jonas and Niken, gue bermimpi kuliah di Jogja dan I’ll do absolutely everything to make that happen). I REALLY REALLY HOPE I COULD BE AS INSPIRING AS CASSANDRA NIKI, buku ini works much better than motivational books dan motivational quotes yg gue baca setiap hari (to keep my dream and optimism alive). Jadi mungkin, 1,2,3,4,5 tahun lagi I’ll have my own book, who knows?

Thanks Cass, great book, great stories, very motivating and captivating. Hopefully we’ll meet each other by coincidence di Bulaksumur, UGM.(And I would love some signature in my book)

Check out her blog, here.

April 19, 2010 / rinta chos

an additional story to complement the great ending

the great ending : diterima sebagai mahasiswi UGM.

and here comes the additional story, the story behind this success. jujur aja gue bilang, berhasil diterima melalui jalur Ujian Tertulis UGM adalah “keberuntungan”. tapi menurut sahabat gue Rivky Rasjid ini adalah: “manifestasi dari kerja keras lo selama ini.pengejewantahan dari semua pengorbanan lo”(I don’t even know what pengejewantahan is, nulis dan ngomongnya aja udah ribet)

Well. Kerja keras? Bekerja keraskah gue selama 8 bulan ini? HELL YEAH.Mungkin gak ngoyo banget, tapi bagi gue ini udah kerja super keras dan ngoyo. Gue harus bimbel di Inten tiap hari Senin, Rabu, Jumat (walaupun jarang masuk krn banyak godaan), terus Sabtu Minggu gue privat Matematika sama Pak Bernard (walaupun dia selalu ngabisin makanan gue dan teriak2 di rumah gue). Gue kerja keras dan gue tau itu, gue merasakan bahwa gue sedang diforsir habis habisan. Kenapa? karena gue udah mengorbankan kesenangan gue. Gue udah jarang baca buku, maen PS, nulis blog, jalan2 sendiri foto2 Jakarta. Gue korbankan semua hal yang gue suka demi mencapai satu tujuan : UGM ATAU UI.Tapi gue tetep harus jujur kalo gue jg super duper beruntung. Kenapa? karena banyak orang yang lebih kerja keras daripada gue, lebih ngoyo, dan mungkin lebih mengorbankan banyak hal tapi belom beruntung dan tidak lolos Ujian Tertulis UGM 2010. Jadi ya betul kata orang-orang, perjuangan masuk PTN itu : 30% kerja keras, 30% doa, dan 40% keberuntungan.

Akhir kata. I would like to say zillion billion thanks to these people below.

Cewe-cewe brengsek yang bikin gue waras dan tidak waras dalam waktu bersamaan. Thank you very much for being a stress reliever. I'm very glad to meet you guys. SUKSES YA CALON CALON ANAK UI.

Teman seperjuangan. Social kids. You guys are the REASON. When someone come into our life for a reason, it is usually to meet a need we have expressed. They've come to assist you through difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support. They've come to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually.They may seem like a GODSEND, and THEY ARE.They're there for a reason you need them to be.Then, without any wrongdoing, the relationship will comes to an means their work has been done and prayer you sent up has been answered and now it's time to move on... Well, you guys are also the SEASON. Because you guys bring me an experience of peace and make me laugh. You guys teach me something I have never done and give me an unbelieveably amount of joy. It's real..but only for a season..and a season will comes to an end.

Walaupun sebentar lagi berakir tapi gue gak akan pernah lupa, karena lo semua adalah bukti kasih sayang Allah sama gue. Bukti bahwa Allah selalu punya rencana terbaik buat gue, mau gimanapun juga. Gue pikir rencana terbaik adalah lulus SNMPTN 2009, gue yakin itu tapi ternyata menurut Allah rencana terbaik adalah ketemu lo semua..dan gue sadar. ternyata emang bener..kalo gue lulus mana ketemu sama orang2 ini?



TERIMAKASIH BANI HASYIM KARENA KEKUATAN DOA KALIAN SUPER DAHSYAT. Dan tentu saja SYUKRON 100X ALLAH SWT , Aku tidak pernah memutuskan harapanku kepada Mu dan bener aja loh Kau memberiku yang terbaik.


PS: blog akan mulai hidup lagi. karena keinginan dan kemampuan menulis muncul kalo saya lagi di rantau. hehehe. Apalagi sepertinya di Jogja banyak inspirasi. ALHAMDULILLAH

March 4, 2010 / rinta chos


“Now I see just what you mean, it hurts too much to breath, all alone in this plastic jungle, Sometimes I wanna get slain, I wanna get slain” – Plastic Jungle by Miike Snow.

Go and try put your head on a closed plastic bag and see what happen, yes, you’re suffocating and it’s hard to breath, you’re lacking an oxygen to help you breath.

I quoted a song from my current favorite band, Miike Snow, they said : I see just what you mean, it hurts too much to breath, all alone in this plastic jungle. Yep, I see just what my class of 2009 friends mean, it is getting harder to breath everyday, not literally but more like metaphorically.Each day taking me closer to UTUL UGM, SIMAK UI, UM UNDIP, UNAIR, whatever whatever, each day taking me closer to a final test, a final test of what I’ve been learning this past 7 months. Anyway, these strangled, asphyxiated feeling it’s not just because of the amount of things I have to learn (which resulting in the lack of time to indulge myself with video games and books and good movies), but also because the amount of money my mom has to spend for it. I already spent almost one million just for the registration, I know my mom wont mind to spend the money because it’s for her youngest daughter’s sake, but DUDE I DO MIND! I CAN USE THAT MONEY TO BUY A HELLUVA LOT OF FOODS AND BOOKS. I really don’t understand how the education thingies work nowadays. When I went to the ATM and paid for these registration, a thought crossed my mind: how about those genius kids who lived under a banana leaf roof, whose parents only make 500 ribu rupiah/month. How are they gonna afford this thing? And that thought saddened me, and kinda like a bitch slap in my face : I should be really really thankful. I might not have my both parents to support my education, but at least my single mom could and would pay for the best education for me, and therefore I should study my ass off to be the best, so I could make a hell lot of money and then buy luxurious stuff for my mom and take her on vacation.


Another thing that strangled me to death is my daily scedhule for now. I have a week packed with courses, I have an intensive course at Inten on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday + private Economics course on Tuesday and Thursday + private Mathematics course on Saturday and Wednesday. Not to mention that I still have to go to school from Monday and Friday, from 6.30 to 15.00. Life’s a cruel bitch lately. I’m restless but taking a rest makes me feel guilty, I can put a baby koala in the circle under my eyes.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// Last year, during this time, I was writing about motivational things for my friends, right now, I’m the one who needs to be motivated. I haven’t lose faith in myself yet, but who knows if I fail one of the upcoming test that I’ll take (UGM, UNDIP, or UI), I’ll be depressed as hell because I HAVE DECIDED TO REPEAT MY FETCHIN SENIOR YEAR IN ORDER TO BE SUCCESFUL AND BE MORE PREPARED FOR ALL THESE THINGIES, I DONT KNOW WHAT WILL I DO IF I FAIL, I SIMPLY HAVE NO MORE YEAR TO FAIL, MY TIME HAS COME TO AN END, I HAVE TO BE ACCEPTED IN UI OR UGM. SO WISH ME A LOT LOT LOT LOT OF LUCK.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// I know my blog aren’t exciting anymore since I came back to Jakarta, well guess what? I miss the excitement of a new things too, BOREDOM KILLS.